why do cheetos always look like penises
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
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