Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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