I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
