I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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