I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize
