i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize