I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Randomize
