Acid is not a monday night drug
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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