How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I'm determined to sit on that face.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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