I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Randomize
