I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
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