i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
