I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
