Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Randomize
