how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Randomize
