Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
