I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Randomize
