She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Sext me about skeletons
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Randomize
