I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Can you bring me the toilet please
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize
