McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
So vagazzling was a success
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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