You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
