3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
