we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
Randomize
