I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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