they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
Randomize
