What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
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