My pussy is not your playground.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
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