Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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