highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Randomize
