Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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