she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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