She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
