I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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