do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
