I'm drive I can fine osifer
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Randomize
