I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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