No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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