But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
Randomize
