just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
Randomize
