I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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