So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Randomize
