the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize
