It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
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