How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
True or false: I did not bring home a 28 year old last night.
True? Did she teach you things?
She taught me the meaning of awkward goodbyes at 530 am.
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
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