i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
