Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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