i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
