i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
Couch. On fire.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
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