I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
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