I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Randomize
