Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
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